To My Parents on My 40th Birthday

by Judi

I sit here a few days before my 40th birthday and I am thinking to myself, wow, I’ve almost made it!  My mother always said that her life began at 40 years of age and I hope this is true for me, too.  I look back on my accomplishments and my failures and think, so far, I have had a pretty good life.  Several people have been influences on me during that time, but perhaps none so much as my parents.  If you don’t like mush, then don’t read, because this post is full of the mush.

To my mother on my 40th Birthday

                Thank you, Mum

  • For carrying me inside you for 9 months and giving birth to me.  After having 3 of my own, I understand how taxing this is on a body and what a joy it is at the same time
  • For giving me 3 brothers and not listening to me when I told you to take Jim back for a sister
  • For always believing in me
  • For teaching me to knit, sew by hand, and crochet
  • For making sure we went to see Grandma and Grandpa regularly…they were amazing and wonderful people to know and were my part of my life-line after you were gone
  • For shopping with me, for taking me out to lunch, for spending time
  • For working so hard at many different jobs over the years
  • For quitting drinking and going to AA…that saved our family and gave me my mommy back.
  • For putting that note on the fridge, about when and where the Alateen program was, and just leaving it there, waiting for us to ask to go. It stayed there for 5 months before I asked.  The people I met there helped shape who I am today.
  • For teaching me how to hug
  • For letting me get my ears pierced at the age of 6, because everyone thought I was a boy.
  • For showing me that you can’t use your problems as a crutch, that you have to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get on with living.
  • For showing me that beauty comes from within, even though sometimes, I still forget.

Mum, you left us too soon.  I miss you every single day.  I love you.

To my father on my 40th Birthday

                Thank you, Dad

  • For loving my mother
  • For the countless hours you spent driving us places, coaching our teams, and watching our tournaments
  • For working so hard, every day, to make sure we had a roof over our heads and food in our belly.  I think I can count on one hand the number of times you called in sick to work.
  • For sending me to sleepovers at Gramma and Grandpa’s house in Toronto.  I loved spending time there, even though Gramma’s Cheerios were stale.
  • For not leaving, when I know that life got pretty bad for a while there…you showed us what being married and committed to a person was all about, and how to not give up
  • For driving to Guelph,  in those last weeks of my first year at University, when my money had run out, to bring me groceries (yes, I remember)
  • For making me pay my own way through school…it showed me that if you want something bad enough, you’ll work for it.
  • For walking me down the aisle
  • For  being there for me when that marriage just could not be saved
  • For buying my son a baseball glove and coming to a game
  • For accepting my very un-traditional new family and allowing them to become part of your lives
  • For spending our inheritance.  Enjoy every penny, you deserve it
  • For loving Judy and bringing her into our lives

I love you, Daddy.

To my step-monster on my 40th Birthday

                Thank you, Judy

  • For letting me call you step-monster
  • For loving my dad…I believe if it weren’t for you, my father surely would have died
  • For quietly and patiently sitting back and letting us forge our own relationship with you, when I am sure you knew that we were all still dealing with our own grief
  • For taking us all into your family
  • For giving me sisters, who made me laugh until my sides hurt and milk almost came out my nose at family dinners, for the one who took me to England with her and offered to take me to the Opera
  • For making Dad throw out those 1970’s, white, patent leather shoes, that he still owned in 1989
  • For watching quietly from the stairs, while the 5 of us kids, and a couple of boyfriends, had a cake fight in our kitchen, eventually breaking a window in the front hall, and not being too mad about it.
  • For making dad pick up the phone to call me…and helping him to remember things like birthdays (yes, I know this is you)
  • For being my Dad’s best friend

You are an amazing lady…I love you, Judy

Take the time today to thank your parents…even for the smallest little thing…


12 responses to “To My Parents on My 40th Birthday

  1. aww you make my eyes fill with tears, you have such a way with words Judi. Happy birthday btw 🙂

  2. I laughed, I cried-beautifully written, Judi!!
    Have a great 40th birthday! I am 40-but still a virgin at it-so no words of wisdom from me-yet!

  3. OK Judi, you made me bawl.. That has to be the sweetest thing ever.. You are an amazing woman who has the most amazing people to love and be your support.
    I hope your next 40 yrs are your best to come..

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! Love you and am glad that we met each other…

  4. You totally suck for making me cry at work.

    OK, maybe you don’t suck that much. ;o)

    Go drink some bubbly on your birthday…you deserve it!

  5. Happy Birthday Judy!

    PS – I’m sure your brother, Jim, is glad your mother didn’t listen to you too. 😉

  6. This was so sweet. You made me laugh and cry too and appreciate my own parents that much more. Thank you for this.

  7. I hope that you had a wonderful birthday!! 🙂 Loved reading this post!

  8. Are you going to give this to your dad or step-monster?

  9. Happy Birthday Judi! See you tomorrow at the party. :o)

  10. That was supposed to be a happy face. LOL

  11. This brought tears to my eyes. How touching. And I had the exact same reaction as you when my parents brought home a little boy instead of a girl too!

  12. Pingback: And so goes another year… | Livin' Large – Tales of a Blended Family

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