The Other Mother ( a non-traditional fairy-tale)

Hello all..as the title would suggest, the other mother would be me. I’m Amy, I’ve been married to my Knight in shining armour, Shane, for 10 years, and ‘wife’ to Judi for the last two. She goes out and tames lions..or something like that..all day, while I cook, clean, do laundry and raise children. What else would she call me?

At 35 years old, I’m often quite surprised to find myself the mother of 7 kids. When I tell people, the reactions vary.  Most of the time I’m either brave or crazy, with the added jaw-drops, bugged eyes and expressions of disbelief. As Kelly Bundy would say, ‘ the mind wobbles’.  Rarely, I get “how wonderful! good for you.'” That’s when my heart grows 3 sizes in my chest, I grin and say “Yes..it is, thanks.” I grew up the only child of an often single mother. I craved ( and begged and pleaded for) brothers and sisters like you wouldn’t believe, and vowed that I would never have ‘just one’ of my own. But this definitely wasn’t the way I thought I’d end up ‘ livin’ large’. You go where the road leads you, though, and now that I’m here, I wouldn’t change it for the world, not even on my worst days.

And make no mistake, there are lots of those. Being the stay-at-home Queen to a 7 month old Princess who I swear is part monkey and will walk any day now would be challenging on it’s own. But then there’s my two-year old Princess, a four year old slightly delayed ( we’ll hit those reasons later) Prince, an autistic 5 year old King, two 9 year old Court Jesters, one of whom has Aspergers and ADHD, and a 17 year old borderline Aspergers Wizard-in-training.

 And yes, they are all mine. I know which ones I gave birth to and which I didn’t, but I don’t make any distinction between the two. I go to teacher’s meetings, sign homework, write sick notes, no matter which kid it is. I don’t go into long-winded explanations..this is our family, our kids have lots of siblings, two moms, in some cases two dads, and that’s that. It’s not terribly unusual in this day and age. What is unusual is it’s not temporary. Now that we’re together, we plan to keep it that way. It might be untraditional, but it’s our happy-ever-after we’re making here, and what’s important is..we’re happy.

It’s busy, it’s sometimes controlled chaos, it’s crazy. How does she do it?, I can hear you asking. Honestly most of the time it’s not that hard. Lots of love, patience, a sense of humour if you can manage it..will get you through just about anything. That and I think I was born to live large, and love it.

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6 responses to “The Other Mother ( a non-traditional fairy-tale)

  1. what a wonderful story to read! Thank you for making my day!

  2. Bravo!! I am in awe. You have managed to find the “Have your cake and eat it too” scenario.
    Not only do you have the benefit of 2 incomes, but you have the most amazing part of a family – the stay at home Mom! I fully believe that having your Mom at home when you get home from school is one of the best things I had as a child. No one has to take time off when a child is sick, someone can take them to the Dr or dentist, without missing work. I am sure many people will envy you!

    • It certainly is wonderful, and I love it! Unfortunately though, Amy doesn’t drive, so I am chief chauffeur for things like extra curriculars and appointments. Thankfully, I have a job that allows me to work from home a couple of days a week, so we schedule appointments then. Works very well.

  3. I love your line, “I know which ones I gave birth too.” I only have one non-“biological” one and it makes no difference in the grand scheme of things! I’m looking forward to reading your blog!

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